The Fretboard

Diatonic theory is weighted towards 3rds (usually alternating major minor major minor major minor or minor major minor major minor major) so we don't get too many augmented or diminished chords. So it's great that the guitar is tuned in perfect fourths to make it easier to fret these chords... no wait it isn't...

The instruments tuned in 4ths (except for that major 3rd) and the chords are mostly built of stacked 3rds.. what does that mean? It means we can quickly construct any root inversion of a chord by planting the little finger on the root note, and planting the 3rd finger a fret or two higher on the next string and the second finger a fret or two higher on the next string and the first finger a fret or two higher on the next string.

Much is made of scale patterns living on the same 4-5 frets and that's great for learning 2 octave scale patterns, although it's good to play backwards to the root note when you hit either the highest or lowest notes in the scale... but diagonals - don't seem that interesting to people.

Name that chord (on the guitar)

short answer - it's a voicing

these notes E G B D are in E minor 7, G maj6, B11, Cmaj9 (without the root), and so on. A pattern on the fretboard can be many things and the best you can hope for, when asking what chord it is, is one person's guess - more often you'll get several people's guesses or on a forum one person's guess supported by other people who like the first person.

So what's a voicing?

It's a sound, perhaps not even unique on the fretboard - it might exist in a slightly different shape 12 frets down and one string lower. But that voicing as described in notation is unique.

Why do I need to differentiate a voicing from a chord?

I think it was Ted Greene (author of the fearfully awesome Chord Chemistry book complete with picture of Ted during his Teen-wolf era on the front) who said "Wes [Montgomery] only knew about 80 chords, but he knew every way of using them." that means the chord would take on different names when played over different bass notes or with other instruments or as substitutions in progressions (which Ted is a master of)

So that Hendrix Chord (X7678X).. it can be lots of other things too, try it resolving to (575755) or (XX5785) it can be an innocuous passing chord sometimes.

The value of calling them voicings is that then it's like a word and words get used in all sorts of places where they sound right, rather than if they're meant to be used with the subject matter, our mouths run away with us and sometimes invent the meaning of our statements if we're not paying close attention - and in music that's okay.

The Samurai used to say "from each lesson learn a thousand things", so from each chord learn it's uses, enjoy experimenting with several voicings that go together well - if you like chords, check out Ted Greens Modern Chord Progressions, practice them enough and you'll find your fingers sneaking them in places you'd never have expected it to make sense - because your ears are talking to your fingers and cutting out the middle-man, with good reason!

How to sound less offensive than Coldplay.

Music theory can be used to create music and the kind of music that music theory creates is often very bland, I'm sorry to break it to you kiddo, I hate giving people bad news.

Why?
If I tell you to get to Aberdeen from London, how would you want to do it? Car with a map, by plane straight there, by train... Who's first thought was "I'll start out on foot, get a bit lost, get some help ... meet an interesting old guy with odd ideas, break the law in a minor way.." what entertains us is the journey and the story and the suspense and guess what there is precious little of when you know what's going to happen next.

How?: in order to answer this question I will use the words "before", "done" "it's", "because" "been". You're disappointed ... okay I'll explain it using the words "dinosaur", "bikini", "explosion", "super hero" and "kipper" - it's probably a lot more exciting hearing that, oh boy you might think, how's he going to use the words dinosaur, bikini, explosion, super-hero and kipper to describe why music theory is bland I bet he can't manage to use the words dinosaur, bikini, explosion, super-hero and kipper to describe why music theory is bland, even now you might be hoping I'll use the words dinosaur, bikini, explosion, super-hero and kipper to describe why music theory is bland but in your secret heart you know I'm not really going to use dinosaur, bikini, explosion, super-hero and kipper to describe why music theory is bland. I'm sorry kiddo I hate giving people bad news.

How?: we know the sounds, they're cultural artefacts. If a bikini clad super hero has to stop a dinosaur from demolishing downtown Tokyo, you know the dinosaur will be defeated and probably not rehabilitated to be a useful member of society wearing a bowler hat and a kipper tie. Explosion!

But that's cheating! Yes if there were any rules. The people that dislike music that doesn't abide by some set of rules are a bit like people annoyed because paintings aren't more like photos... photos are more like photos, so lets do something else.

The Nashville system uses roman numerals to denote the diatonic chords in a song. So the 12 bar blues can be written ||: I | I | I | I | IV | IV | I | I | V | IV | I | I :|| that's the I(one) chord say C major, the IV (four) chord F major and V (five)chord G major or in the key of Bb I(one) chord Bb major, the IV (four) chord Eb major and V (five)chord F major - the notation allows people to transpose quickly.

whatever you do, DON'T use lower case letter to denote minor chords in the Nashville notation: I ii iii IV V vi viib5 isn't big or clever.

A lot of times the most interesting sounds are distinctly NOT the chords you're expecting ... turning them to a minor or a diminished and so on sounds great

I woke up this morning - it was asleep, I was crashing about - sorry.

12 Bar blues, until you have been to a poorly organised blues jam in Surrey... until you have been to a poorly organised blues jam in Surrey - you do not know the 12 bar blues, my friend.

The twelve bar blues is a formula for slow people thinking, described by the chords of the Nashville system. When it's done badly - it can be done well and I like blues music but when it's done bad it's like a formula that's writ large. Here, I'll describe a standard 12 bar a bar per line.

I) Lawd gawd ahm so unheppy.
I) something bad heppened to me
I) Lawd gawd ahm so unheppy.
I) something bad heppened to me
IV) ah could do something
IV about it
I) but then I wouldn't have
I) no misery
V) I could cheer myself up
IV) with some blueberry pie
I) but ahm so unheppy
I) and there'd be nothing for the next verse.

rinse - repeat until someone comes up and murders that song by The Meters. The thing to learn from this is the sound of the root chord, the fourth chord, the fifth chord and the pulls they lend to the music.

A great game to play is trying to work out what bar someone is on based on those sounds, so duck out of the pub and come back in again.. bar 11 is a rallying point where the musicians wake and know to get back to the beginning or maybe if we're really lucky stop.

Widdershins is best (I'm left handed)

The cycle of fifths... the evil cousin of the cycle of fourths...

The cycle of fifths is kinda like the Romulans, most of the good music in the world was written for saxophones and brass instruments and so exists in the flat registers - I'm not saying banjos and mandolins are evil - I'm not allowed to.

Why is a cycle of fourths better? Well think about learning modes in a derivative method... it goes fourth-wise, like the enigmatic vulcans... they go fourth-wise believe me. C Ionian (flatten the seventh) = C mixolydian (F major) (flatten the seventh) = C Dorian (Eb Major) (flatten the seventh) = C Minor (Ab Major) (flatten the seventh) = C Phrygian (Db Major) and so on.

Now what does that mean? Try this experiment, you'll need 7 cans of stella ... or if you drink a fair bit or play Jazz 7 litre bottles of Leffe. With no bottles of beer in you, we'll call that the ionian mode - normality... drink a beer .. now you're relaxed and cracking jokes, you've got a rye look at the world that's kinda like the mixolydian mode, have another beer - that's the dorian mode, you're starting to get a bit cynical now but it's it's okay it's okay I got my health... down another beer, it's time to get sentimental and maudlin now (all of a sudden Santana seems to be describing what you're feeling - learn to avoid that) - that's the Aeolian mode (at other times you'd chuckle about it sounding like ariolum but not now it's a sad wind harp)... down another beer... DOWN THE BEER!! now it's the phrygian mode you want to keep drinking but your scaring yourself a little it's scary.. it's okay press on down another beer and into the locrian zone... you are talking gibberish, noone understands you - you don't care, it's the little pigs all over again and noone's going to have avacado this time... noone it's alright, last beer... too many you've lost the root node there's nothing to link it to the C major chord - you're in the first circle of hell, unbaptised children and good heathens.. look out red-shirted guy... oh too bad.. I'll have to write a letter to his parents.

Well that is the major modes a continuous curve around the cycle of fourths... uh, you want to know about the Lydian? The lydian is dreaming it's not rooted in the present, I suggest avoiding it as people who play the lydian for too long end up sucking their cheeks in.. worse than that you need to read George Russells book on Lydian Chromatic Concepts..

Music, the final frontier... these are the voyages of the self-taught theory-phile on a 7 year mission to seek out strange new words, seek out new links and new categorizations, to boldly go where no man has cared to go before.

These are all told with hindsight, which gives me the humour to admit to the cul-de-sacs, the nebulous topics and alluring green alien concepts I've fleetingly encountered. This is not meant as a means to obtain Pat-Martino-like skills in visualising or conceptualizing music for that read Linear Sound, Advancing Guitarist and the like.

This is kinda intended to be like Zen Guitar but with examples of failure, set-back, misconception, defeat to mitigate any sense of achievement in distracting yourself too greatly with the significance of notes.

Ultimately anything you understand intellectually about music goes out the window when you play along with any rhythm instrument from a metronome up, and all you're left with is what's instinctive internalised knowledge and if you've been hitting the paper and pen hard and not the guitar (as I had) that can be quite humbling... but hey, enough about that, lets check out some theory and observations